{"id":263,"date":"2005-08-08T14:06:52","date_gmt":"2005-08-08T18:06:52","guid":{"rendered":"\/?p=263"},"modified":"2005-08-08T14:06:52","modified_gmt":"2005-08-08T18:06:52","slug":"ninja-cockroaches","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/?p=263","title":{"rendered":"ninja cockroaches"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s been brought to my attention that <em>someone<\/em> has been sending ninja cockroaches after me in a failed attempt at kidnap.  Security on the premises has been redoubled, but if I go missing&#8230; then you know the worst may have happened.  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s been brought to my attention that someone has been sending ninja cockroaches after me in a failed attempt at kidnap. Security on the premises has been redoubled, but if I go missing&#8230; then you know the worst may have happened.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advgb_blocks_editor_width":"","advgb_blocks_columns_visual_guide":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-263","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-russell"],"author_meta":{"display_name":"megan","author_link":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/?author=1"},"featured_img":null,"coauthors":[],"tax_additional":{"categories":{"linked":["<a href=\"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/?cat=15\" class=\"advgb-post-tax-term\">russell<\/a>"],"unlinked":["<span class=\"advgb-post-tax-term\">russell<\/span>"]}},"comment_count":"0","relative_dates":{"created":"Posted 21 years ago","modified":"Updated 21 years ago"},"absolute_dates":{"created":"Posted on 8.8.2005","modified":"Updated on 8.8.2005"},"absolute_dates_time":{"created":"Posted on 8.8.2005 2:06 pm","modified":"Updated on 8.8.2005 2:06 pm"},"featured_img_caption":"","series_order":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/263","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=263"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/263\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=263"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=263"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/evilmoose.me\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=263"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}